Bikini Churches Cover the Essentials

I must say that I was ecstatic to recently read that there is a growing rejection of megachurches. A basic movement away from large indifferent churches. A movement toward home churching. Which is small groups meeting in each other’s homes to worship God together. Praise God! Finally a few have found the relevant Bible quotation which pertains to mini-micro churches: “Where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I.”

Perhaps, just perhaps, enough snake oil has been swallowed. Enough people are turned off by pablum bland worship services. Turned off by services that look more like the Ed Sullivan Show. For those of you who are members of the younger set, that was a variety show on early TV. Today, think Jay Leno or Dave Letterman.

Possibly enough people are turned off by church “leaders” caught buying or seeking services from male and female prostitutes. Possibly they are turned off by church “leaders” caught embezzling millions of church funds. Are they turned off by church “leaders” using mass media to extract the last farthing from poor, TV land, stay at home partitioners? Possibly it is just that people are turned off by church “leaders” caught exhibiting extraordinary skill at inserting their own hoof in their own mouth.

TV time is really expensive. Most of the money extracted goes to buy more TV time. Church buildings are expensive and get used very little of the time. Church staffing is expensive. That includes the minister, the assistant minister, the second assistant minister, the secretary, the assistant secretary, second assistant secretary, clerks, organizers, and coordinators. There is an easy rule that applies to all large institutions: about 80% of all funds go to staff and buildings. Schools, libraries, and generally, all government. Churches are not an exception.

You do not have to be a follower of bland, pablum like, TV land style religious leaders. Your beliefs and religious practices do not have to fit a one size fits all church. Religion is not like a hamburger or pizza franchise. You can choose a micro church. You can choose a Mom and Pop operation instead. What does it take to see that Jesus came to us to lead a revolution against the excesses of the Temple? Today’s Temples exhibit the same excesses. All that is generally left out is blood sacrifices of living creatures. Bikini churches are the solution for today’s revolution.

When the practice of your religion takes place at home in the neighborhood, love you neighbor gains new meaning. You are taking care of the essentials.

Assuming that your family is one of the more extraordinary examples and that you tithe a full 10% of (after tax) income. Further assume that your combined family gross income is $80,000. Net after taxes and deductions is around $60,000. At 10%, that is $6,000 per year or $500 a month donation to your church. 80% of that, or $400 goes to the church mortgage, utilities, maintenance (paint, parts, and labor), and staff salaries and bennies. $100 goes to charities and good works. Maybe.

I’m glad to hear that more and more folks are more inclined to cut out the middle man. They want to connect directly with God. Praise God! That is covering the essentials. The bikini was a nice analogy and got your attention. I’m older than the bikini. I remember when it was a tiny island in the Pacific Ocean. The tiny bombshell of a swimsuit was named after the island when we blew it up with an atomic bomb. That also got your attention.

One thing you can take to the bank. The denizens of the glass and steel mega-palaces with 10,000 seat auditoriums, sound stages, and million dollar PA systems are going to fight back. They are already starting to wring their hands and decry the straying of the sheep from the sheering rooms, er . . . "doctrine”, this sinking into “cults”, and this movement away from “tradition”.

The next steps in their attacks on the mini-churches will be formal excommunication, banning, accusations of “Antichrist”, blasphemy, devil worship, and witch hunts. Breaking on the rack and burning at the stake would be next on the agenda. That has been the established practices of the past, it will come again, if we allow it to happen.

In a religious gathering of two to ten, you have a human sized group. You can offer human sized emotional support to each other. You can read and discuss relevant religious passages of your choice and immediate need, line by line and word by word. Your spiritual equal is at your elbow.

One last item. For all, who decide that their loyalty is to God. That their loyalty is not to a pile of bricks, steel and glass with a fakir on the podium. Be aware that the fakirs will send infiltrators from the ranks of their leadership. Some will even be “volunteers”, keeping an eye on “things”. One of the definitions of leadership, being a leader is: a person who sees, or senses, a mass movement of people. A leader then runs out in front of the pack, in the direction of travel, gets well out in front, waves his arms over his head, and yells. “Follow Me! Follow Me!”

Don’t be a fool. Don’t be fooled. Meet in someone else’s home next time and don’t tell the “volunteer” where it is. Heck, meet in the city park. He’ll never think to look for you there, under the sky blue blanket of God. A live tree is a better backrest than a dead pew. If you see a unique squirrel, and want to get close, you can neek up on him.

Article Source: http://www.religionarticlelibrary.com

(c) Copyright 2006: George Wallace recently published a book on religion which lashes out at nearly all of the comfortable ideas about God, the trappings of organized religion, and the priesthood. His pithy comments and suggestions for a return to a God-centered personal religion will interest everyone. This article may be freely reprinted so long as all copyright attributions, and the full content of this resource box are included. www.OhGodIsThatYou.com

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